Why "that dress"? Reflections from Rajinder Pryor MBE

Blog

9 Dec

By Rajinder Pryor MBE

From the moment I saw that dress I loved it…little did I know when I bought it many years ago what great importance and meaning it would hold.

In my experience you can never find the dress you want when you need it. So, being someone who always plans ahead, as soon as I saw that dress, I knew I’d have an occasion for it. Ever since I bought it, it has hung in the special corner of my wardrobe for years, labels still intact. Its time had not come until this year on 30 March.

For the momentous occasion I found myself attending — my Investiture at Windsor Castle — I had already bought two new dresses. When it came nearer the time, I prepared a week in advance trying on all the new dresses I had (that still fit!).

It was a statement of my resilience and a call to action to all men.

Standing in front of the mirror I pondered on my journey and the recognition I was about to receive. I reflected on my challenges, my achievements, my purpose. I realised in that that moment that I’d wear that dress , the one I’d bought all those years ago. That dress is a black and white frock, matching the colours of White Ribbon UK, and designed so the white accents wrapping around the dress look like white ribbons, similar to the movement’s symbol for ending men’s violence against women.

That dress would see me attend my Investiture at Windsor Castle. It was a statement of my resilience and a call to action to all men, like my husband, to stand up for women and girls.

I felt proud to wear that dress when I received my MBE. I felt proud that I was driving change for my daughters. I felt proud to have my husband by my side — a remarkable male ally, who was instrumental in encouraging me to speak at my first ever White Ribbon Day event in 2017 hosted by Telstra. He has always upheld his personal promise to me when in the past the men closest to me failed me.

And today he too is an advocate of White Ribbon UK, spurring me on in the wings.

Wearing that dress was an equally important part of the day. The message it conveyed was “Will you support us? Will you take action? Will you stop violence against women and girls?”.

Together, as an industry, we can achieve so much.

Working in the rail industry has played a huge part in my life. It’s a powerful industry for many reasons. It builds the railway. It builds bridges and stations. But it also builds its people — the most vital asset of all.

Network Rail has stepped out from the crowd, leading in being an organisation who is accredited by White Ribbon UK, and has become a driving force for change in the industry.

As is so often said in the railway, “we are one team”. Together, as an industry, we can achieve so much.

I love working with men on the same team who, as allies, share my passion to make the world a safer place for women and girls whilst being role models for other men and boys.

Allies like Peter Wilkinson, Managing Director Passenger Services at the Department for Transport, and a White Ribbon Ambassador.

Allies like Ola Ogun, Chief Financial and Operating Officer at Rail Delivery Group and a Women in Rail Trustee.

As we come towards the end of the 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence, now is the time to step away, to no longer be a bystander and to help reach #TheGoal.

Will you support and join the team Peter and Ola, along with many other men, have signed up to?

Will you promise to never use, excuse, or remain silent about men’s violence against women today?